How much of a role to play?

As a new player, one of the hardest things for me to figure out is how much role playing the group is comfortable with. Sure, I'm not going to be great at it at first, but that's an entirely different thing from determining how much the rest of the group is amused by it. If I do too much, I'm worried that some people will get bored or upset that the DM is spending more time on my character. If I do too little, well the truth is I might as well be playing Avernum instead.

In addition to the amount of role playing, it's hard to figure out what I should include and what I should leave out. Even though I was a tomboy growing up and am most comfortable around guys, I still have a few, more stereotypically girly thoughts than most of the group. For instance, my character isn't looking for a shining white knight but she also has some romantic notions of adventuring since her parents met as adventurers. But that leaves me with a ton of questions. Can she have crushes? Should she blush whenever a handsome waiter asks her a question? Should she get her own room at the inn especially since one of her fellow adventurers is a bit of a heel? Can she hide behind the dragon-born whenever she sees a monster that really scares her? To me, these are important matters but I'm not sure how important or amusing they are to the guys.

So far, she hasn't done too much of that sort of thing. Most she's done is write in a letter to her parents that the paladin has good hands (which made him reply "but I'm celibate") and I've written about her henna tattoo. I'm sure I'll figure it out as time goes on and I'm sure Sarah will find a love interest or two (if only in her journal). But I would love to hear your thoughts.